A Call to War
A Call to War
Summary: Sometimes the right decision is the most surprising one of all.
Date: PHD 39
Related Logs: Related Logs None

The Navy offices are busy per usual it seems as already Ensigns and Jigs work diligently at their departments desk, typing out memos only to gurry and send a runner off and out. Given, though that the Chapel has no formal room in the back for more private or office like matters, the Chaplain finds himself on a crowded desk, with sermon notes, and meeting memos scattered about. he also is busy with planning and cordinating the Colonial day celebrations. So at the moment it is all busy, busy busy, at the desk, but that does not mean Ajax, would not welcome an interruption.

Mac has just come from a night without sleep. It was spent in good company though. He has to wonder if he'll get a dressing down, because when he realized he was just about to be late to this meeting? He hadn't had the actual time to spare to rearrange his hair, so it hands in silky, shiny waves well past his shoulders. Usually it's tightly bound with the tail tucked down the back of his duty blouse to obscure it. Obviously not so now. There's a moment of nervousness as he steps into the office, over what Ajax might say, or must be thinking about the revelations of the night before. For his part though? There's a freedom in Cygnus' spirit that's never been there before. And with it comes a profound amount of peace. It clings to him, easily sensed by someone as perceptive as his CO is.

Ajax glances up from his desc, when the slight shadow of his Assisstant shows in the lovely stale lighting of the navy offices. Despite the rich and warm tones of the wood. this is still an escort carrier, and this is still some form of office. The one eye looks up and he grins, teeth easily seen through his own short cropped beard. In Support you could get away with a few things. Not many though. "Marius." comes the voice, and the tone warm, as he motions to the seat across from him. "Have a sit.." a chuckle there as he gives the Lieutenant a second over. "Long night?"

"Some drinking," Cygnus admits, "A lot more talking though." Almost half a lifetime's worth, really. which covered just about every topic imaginable. "In the future Castor might not give you as much of a hard time, Sir." Mac had pleaded his CO's case, explained what it would be like were the shoe on the other foot, and his friend had agreed to try to be better about things. "Just… ease up on the religion with him, and it should be. I'm working on it in my own way, Sir."

"Only some?" a chuckle, but either way it seems your CO is just his usual self. a flip over some papers before he is clearing things away so as hands can rest laced on the desk top. "Good, cause I was ripe about to belt him in the mouth.." Whether that is true or not, Ajax doesn't comment before he is chuckling again. "The funny thing was, to get on his bad side, from what I recall, is I just entered the room, and he was on me like a tick on a dog." a kiss of his teeth, before he is looking back to you. "we have some things to talk about, son. I hope you have a minute or two to spare?"

Cygnus finally settles himself into the chair across from Ajax. He was starting to think his ass was going to become permanently grafted to the seat he'd been inhabiting in the lounge for so long. Honestly it felt good to stretch his legs some on the route here. "I have as much time as you need, Sir." Yup, there's definitely an undercurrent of nervousness there, beneath the exterior of calm. After all, he's spent the past 34 years of his life hiding who he truly was from those around him for fear of reprisals. Finally, he ventures, "How can I be of assitance, Sir?"

"I was wanting to talk about your transfer with you." Ajax says simply. the things said of last night seem not to even be a matter or something that would need a come to the gods meeting over in Ajax view. And so they aren't even addressed by him at the moment. "I spoke with Captain Marek, yesterday about how you would fit in with the squad, and what sort of man you were."

He will let that hang "I gave you a good reccomendation..and I will let you know this now. If the paper comes from them for me to sign over, I will, but I have one condition."

Here, Cygnus is almost holding his breath. Wow, who knew he could fidget quite like that. It's nearly impossible to sit still, however. He can feel the tips of his fingers tremble a bit, and wills them to still themselves. Breathe in. Breathe out. Enhance the calm. He doesn't quite trust his voice to speak, so instead he merely nods to his superior officer. Mac's a fairly easy going creature. And a hard worker to boot. More than likely he'll be amenable.

Ajax grins for a moment before looking down. "I would like you to still help out if and when you can. You're a good lad and a tremendous help. I know fighter duty will take a lot of your time, but please do not forget about us in the Chapel." And with that it seems the Chaplain's piece is there. "I wish you luck, son."

Both men have been thinking along the same lines. "Speaking freely, Sir? I could never truly abandon the Chaplaincy altogether." It makes a certain sort of sense, really, and Mac leans forward in the chair, clasping his hands together before settling them on the top of the desk. "I could no sooner sever myself from my spiritual nature, than I can from the part of myself that is all pilot, Sir. They go hand in hand. It's just I generally deliver my prayers from the cockpit, as opposed to the pulpit. In either role, my desire is to help others. To protect them. Be it their lives or their spirits and souls. I think you'd have to formally order me out of the Chapel to truly get rid of me, Sir." A grin breaks across his features as he speaks, and pure, unadulterated truth rings in his words.

"Granted." said, though Ajax has never been too formal with you, unless he neded you to get to work and out of the sickbay. Not much of one for orders is the Chaplain, but he will make them on occassion if it means the person is better for it. But the words you say, the ones that ring out and all do make him smile a bit wider than he has in the past few days before he is chuckling softly. "Well good. I tell you son. A Son of Ares is just a Preist who fights, thogh instead of words against the enemy, you will practice with arrows and prayers. All the luck of the gods to you in your endeavor." and there is a pat of the desk. "Also Marius?"

a breathe before he is nodding. "I am glad you are free to be the person you are. You should feel that in all walks..And you will find no judgement in this office, or in the Chapel."

Cygnus's throat tightens for a moment at those words. It's a very new sensation, being open with others the way he is now. He still isn't certain whether or not the truth of his preferences will end up ensuring that Marek won't want him in the Squadron. The Captain's a tough read, and a Sagittaron as well. So to Mac's kind it could go either way. The thing he's come to realize in the past twenty four hours though? The thing that's leant him this new calm? Is truly knowing instinctively that whether he ends up in the aforementioned cockpit, or the pulpit, it will the will the Ares and the Gods. Either way he will fulfill the role he was saved by them to fill. In recounting his tale to Castor the night before, he'd had a profound revelation. One he knows he must share with the Padre. It's what prompts him to say, "Padre?" It's the first time Mac has truly addressed him as such, indicating that that which he wishes to speak of, has nothing to do with a temporal sense of duty, but something far more spiritual and ethereal. He's address his CO as a petitioner to his priest now. "There's a matter in which I could use your council, when you have the time for it."

Ajax tilts his head before there is a motion to continue shown with a distinct grace of his hand "Go on then son, tell me what is on your mind.." And he will do his best, not only as your CO, but as your Priest to see if he can't help you suss it out one way or the other- or if he might make you feel content in the mystery of the matter.

"It's about the nature of my dreams," Mac recounts simply. "The ones I mentioned briefly the other night. Last night when I was speaking to Tinman, I had an epiphany and I began to understand the reason for my coming here in the manner that I did." He takes a deep breath, the story isn't short, but he will try his best not to belabor the point, he knows that Ajax has a full plate on the average day, and more than that on others. "As I've told you, I've never taken Chamalla, for fear of its side effects. Nor do I wish now, unless it is something that you would advise." He waits for leave to continue on in the matter.

"I see." says Ajax as he starts to listen for a moment hands cmoing to meet at his chin and let fingers press lightly at his jaw for a second. words heard and his one eye closes, thought washing over him as calm exudes just a little more than usual before he is looking back to you. "I think now, son, with you trying to become a pilot, we will steer away from Chamalla, but if you do stay for whatever reason in my department, then we will see what we can glean.." a pause "Sometimes, marius…The gods can give us dreams as a way to show us our path, make us eager to get there, and once we do, we understand why we went the route we did..Sometimes there is more..Hence the mystery of prophecy."

"I've come to believe that what I'm about to tell you was truly the manner of my temporal salvation." Marius has never been able to speak in these terms to anyone else. Few would understand the nature of the words in the way that knows Ajax will. "In a very literal sense." There's a pause as he gathers his calm about him. "My prescience began when I was about five or so. Each dream was strictly a one shot deal, you understand? The first one I remember is almost laughable really, our dog ran away and we couldn't find him at all. I was very attached to him. I had a dream that he'd gotten himself stuck in this abandoned warehouse on the other side of town. And it came to pass that we found him exactly there." Of course his father never doubted such dreams, being a priest himself. "There was a pattern to them though. I would have a dream, and the relevant events would come to pass shortly thereafter, usually within the timespan of a week. No more than that. Sometimes sooner." Here he pauses the flow of his words to allow the Padre time to digest them and reflect upon them.

Ajax remains silent, clearly, he is waiting for Cygnus to continue in the matter before anything else is said on his end. He needs all of the story before anything more can be decided or rectified.

Ajax will remember the state that Cygnus arrived under his care in. Emaciated and haunted. His eyes sunken in and marred by dark circles that looked near to bruises. Completely jittery and sleep deprived to the point that there was a continual trembling in his fingers and hands, and he would jump out of his skin at the slightest sound. A very different man than the one that sits here now. The reason for that is about to be revealed to the priest. "When I was getting my masters in military history, of course we spent an entire semester devoted to the battles of the Cylon War. During that semester, one night, each month I would have a horrible nightmare. Because of the repititive nature of these dreams, and because they didn't appear - at the time - to be of prophetic nature, I shrugged them off. Attributed them to my subconcious embellishing upon the things we were being taught in course work." Fast forward a year ago. "While I was on Solaria last year, they came back. They were… unspeakable. Incomprehensible really. Death. Destruction. Carnage on a scale I couldn't even begin to understand. Total devestation and desolation." Clearly to bear such a thing had become something aking to sheer torture not only on the body, but on the mind and spirit as well. "At first they were intermittetent, and then they began to come each night. I would be asleep perhaps five or ten minutes before being bombarded with these images." Dreams of what was to come, clearly. "They intensified to the point that I woke up with night terrors, and after awhile I simply stopped sleeping altogether. I tried to hide the effect they had on me, but eventually I couldn't fly reliably and I was removed from duty. That's when I was transferred to this department and this ship, and remanded into your care, Padre. And thus you came to know that me, who was not truly me, but a haunted soul. When we made the jump into space with the Constantine, I knew in that momentary time between time and space what was about to occur. That the horrific nightmares truly /were/ another set of prescient dreams. What I've also come to know though, had I not had those dreams. Had I not been transfered? I would have died along with all those souls on my former ship. Died in flight with the rest of my squadron. As terrible as all of that was to bear? It was truly my salvation."

Silence is what Cygnus is given for a moment or two longer before the Priest is watching him carefully, and then does his voice rise, as does he. "And since then these dreams have stopped. I can tell from how you look. Perhaps, Marius, these dreams when they first manifeted were done so to make you ready for the scale in which they would come..And then when it did, the gods pushed their weight on you." or so how he sees it. "I believe by showing you that, Ares did call you to war, son. For an oracle had similar dreams..And here we are now." A look to him. "Right now, do not worry on your call, for you were called. Worry on it later when you're placed. Then- then will this all make sense. You have a touch of war-boy. And that can be a grand, and dangerous thing." And with that Ajax tuned and made his way for the office door, a motion for you to follow, as he is on his way to service.

In a graceful movement, Cygnus rises to his feet to follow Ajax towards the Chapel. The priest's words still ring in his ears, worming their way into his consciousness. More than food for thought there. There's a profound sense of calm that's settled over the man. As if some sort of decision has been reached in his mind. His sister, Mia, had said to him some time back, that Marius was more than the sum of his parts. A smart woman, she is. No doubt of that. That coupled with Ajax's words have sunk in. Straddling two paths. The question that burns in his mind now, however is whether or not one necessarily has to exclude the other. There's something in the air. It's almost crackling with a strange sort of energy. What will come? Who knows. But the hairs standing up on end on the back of Cygnus' neck seems to tell a tale that this, perhaps, will not be an ordinary service. Words are spoken. The same words that he'd said to his sister earler. "I was wrong. You were right." A simple admission that says far more than the words can express.

Ajax halts where he is for a moment in the movements and looks back towards Cygnus with a brow raised slightly, hands leaving where they had clasped themselves behind his back. He knows something made an impact but to what he does not know. A lick of his lips for a moment and he keeps himself rooted just right there in the doorway almost in the hallway, staying between the two different worlds for a moment before he takes on step out. "In what way, Marius?"

"I wanted to deny that I'd been called by Ares. I've been fighting against a part of myself." Marius' voice is soft and subdued, thoughtful, as he speaks. "I'd always assumed that battle was the pilot fighting the priest. That really had nothing to do with it. What I was really fighting was the opression of fear. Fear of being who, and what I am. Fear of telling the truth to those around me, because of what might happen. That doesn't matter. My fate? My fate is in Ares' hands. Not the hands of men. Pilot? Priest? That is no longer /my/ decision."

"Well, we all deny initially what we are meant to be one way or the other. I was bor a farmer, did you know that?" askas Ajax as he continues out into the Hallway for a moment. Walking down the corridors as he continues talking "Yeah I was a farmer, but never liked being what I was.. Signed up with the Marines to see th' colonies. Travel space, an all that.." a laugh there as he continues moving headed for the Chapel.."I had just got my first fireteam as my sergeant was picked off the day before when we landed on Sagittaron..There were terrorists that were going after Colonial officals..families.."

"Were you a priest first? Or a marine? Or both?" There seems to be a purpose to that pointed question. "Does one preclude the other?" Mac isn't certain if that is a simple question, or the literal opening of a can of worms. After all, in the end, they serve a far Higher purpose and force than the Colonial Military. "The military, they feel the need to catagorize. To slot each piece into a carefully predetermined place. Can one slot the soul or purpose in the same way? I don't believe so."

"After.." added as Ajax looks back to Mac for a moment, taking time to press against a bulkhead as a group of ensigns, running memos make a beeline for the Naval offices. "After. Its where I got my aversion to Dionysian style of worship really.. Broke into one of their compounds, had bust through so many of em that wee were closing in. Came, I guess into what was a Cult of Dionysius in hiding.. The head priest looked at me and pointed before he ripped out his own guts..Mimic of Proteus an his punishment for bringing fire.. Bloody died right there, and then a sniper bullet hit me in the eye and I went down, even before my frst shot went out and got one of the bastards next to him." all grumbled out before he is moving on. "Thing is, I never understood things till after that moment.." a shrug of shoulders. "Wasn't made for being a Marine..t' stay woulda been my death..I was called for something else."

"I'm sorry that that happened to you, Padre." The words ring entirely true and sincere. "My father had always warned me to stay away from the Dionysians. He of course, accepted their right to worship as they would, but he always found it all rather sordid in practice. I think I began to understand that yesterday." When Nine had been performing her pronations and flagellations before the Altar. "I think, though, perhaps you are very right. I cannot imagine you as a killer, my friend. It doesn't seem to me to be your nature." Of course, Marius could be wrong on that account, but there's a feeling of truth to it in his gut. "I've never had to take on human combatents. I've been fortunate in that regard."

"I'm only sorry I lost my eye. I was rather fond of it." A chuckle from Ajax as he starts on and waves it off for a moment. "Yeah..I'll never kick em out of my walls..but damned if I will ever understand it or practice it. They go too far sometimes..Obviously" a sniff for a moment before he'slooking to you. "Aye..Took a lot to work that killing machine out. Sure some aspects of the corps I keep, but not all. FOund Poseidon then, had a come to the water.." a pause and he is fixing his patch again. "Killed me many men before this..and I have yet to pay for that.." added slightly softly. "As for if one can be both. I think so..And in that I think some gods work. Like Ares..You are both priest and pilot then lad. Lead through example, eh?"

That is the determination that Cygnus has come to himself. He is neither priest, nor pilot, but both. Blended and melded into one human form. What passes between he, his Priest and the Gods is of no import to the ship hierarchy and chain of command to his mind. Perhaps his secular superiors might take a different view of that, but who can tell. Where he is assigned has no bearing on the vows of his soul, or his comment to the Gods. "I think that is true. For a priest of Ares is warrior by nature. Steeled for Battle. I lost sight of that." There's a calm certainty that seems to cling to Marius now, a sense of peace that was not there even a day before. It's been a day of revelations, to be sure. "How long did you serve as a Marine then, before you felt the call and salvation of The Seas?"

"I knew a Gunnery Sergeant who was an Ares follower.." added as they continue through the maze of hallway work on his way towards the Chapel, a pause and he doubles back, but still talking. Apparently despite being stationed here since the damned beginning, he still gets lost going to the chapel "Frakking halls-He would go with two pistols, one in each hand into fire fights. Was a sight." and then he looks to you. "I got out of the Corps at 23? Joined when I was 18. Got out of Seminary when I was 28.."

"That must have been a sight to behold," Cygnus agrees, speaking to the point of the aforementioned Gunny. "For me it was the inverse. I completed Divinity first, then military history, and the Naval Academy and Advanced Flight. That was how my father insisted it must be." A bit of a smile traces across his features, though the sense of calm still blankets him, oozing from his very pores. "He was a far wiser man than I've ever given him credit for until this day." Ajax is not the only one who stills get lost in the maze, Cygnus does as well. Likely because of the fact that so few of the stairs go through all the decks. It's like a rabbit warren. That strange crackle of engery is still there for Mac to feel. It seems to propel him along on the path he must now walk. Yet there's no fear, no regret attached to it. Merely fulfillment.

"Our parents always are.." responds the Priest finally before he is shaking his head. His own father had said something similar, but more like you're a fool boy who is going to go an get his head shot off, an we won't show to your funeral. Oh parents. And so he stops, looking down towards the corrdor and already people can be seen filing down into the chapel ways. A chuckle. "So now it comes, what will you do?"

It's not that Mac is trying to be enigmatic, it is merely that he's speaking in the lexicon of the spiritual, which often times tends to that type of speech. "I think we both know, my brother," That is the first time that Cygnus has ventured to call anyone by a manner like that in the realm of the spiritual. It feels odd. Yet right at the same time. "It can be felt in the air. What is right." There's such /certainty/ there. It's different than anything he's ever felt before. "It's time to kneel before the Altar, is it not? And swear the Sacred Vow to War."

Ajax grins wide. You can see it there, that he knows what you mean. Where as you will have a different service, Ajax was drowned, baptized in the sea and pulled back, given new life from the waves. He knows exactly what you must do on these days, even as your calling- nay your true occupation hangs in the balance. your calling is true. "Then I am going to ask you to fast within reason, Marius Cygnus, for soon. You will be a son of Ares." a wide grin and off he is goig, to join the others in the Chapel. He has a service to commence.

There is no doubt that Marius will join and assist in the celebration of the service this night. As is right, and fitting and proper in these times. What his superiors will make of this? Only time will tell. There is only one thing that matters now in the realm of the temporal and the spiritual. That Ares' will be done.

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